Strange, though, how joy rides on the back of sorrow. You have to feel both to feel either. And no amount of best intentions can keep you from hurting what you love.

These sentences are an example of the beautiful, soul-nourishing prose one can expect to find in Jody Hobbs Hesler’s debut novel, Without You Here. Her descriptions are fresh and interesting. Check out this, for example:  Silence continues to pump up the stairs like smoke. For me, the mark of a good book is the number of sentences you underline while reading. I found plenty in this novel.

The story is about twenty-seven-year-old Noreen whose beloved aunt, Nonie died by suicide at the same age. The two are similar in personality and appearance, a fact that keeps Noreen and her family on high alert, all parties worried about Noreen’s mental health and behavior. Noreen has difficulty navigating relationships with family, friends, and most of all, her husband George. Filled with self-doubt. Noreen rarely mounts a defense when accused and often blames herself for the bad actions of others.

Nonie loved Noreen unconditionally. This meant a lot to Noreen, who received little affirmation in life.  When Noreen’s elementary school teacher described her as a quirky loner who reads too much, her own mother didn’t defend her. But Nonie thought Noreen was perfect as is. Saturday mornings, Nonie brought her niece special gifts and sugary cereal. But, more importantly, she brought spontaneity and joy into the child’s life.

Nonie’s death devastated Noreen. Even though she was only a small child at the time, Noreen found a way to blame herself for the suicide.

The novel is not told in chronological order, which can be a risky choice for a writer. However, Hesler met the challenge. The story flowed well, had excellent pacing, and plenty of narrative tension. Hesler’s words fully engaged me right from the first page. I read the book in a just few sittings.

Each chapter has a title that orients the reader in time. The reference point for each section is the chapter called August 1980 During, which is the month Nonie died by suicide. Chapter titles have descriptors like, Weeks Before, Six Weeks After, or Nineteen Years Later. This might sound confusing, but it’s not. As you begin reading, the order makes sense.

Despite bouncing around in time, the flow works well. Hesler places chapters adjacent to each other by virtue of their emotional content. Hesler’s close attention to the emotional landscape of her scenes allows her to create natural connections between chapters even though the events taking place in them are separated by decades. For example, we’ll see chapter written about Noreen’s childhood which is followed by a chapter set when Noreen is an adult. The side-by-side chapters complement each other by revealing much about the innerworkings of Noreen’s character during different stages of her life. Hesler uses this approach for all her main characters, which gives the reader deep empathy for them.

Hesler’s acknowledgement page is evidence of her extensive research on suicide. She writes her story with respecet, authority, and confidence, paying close attention to both Nonie’s struggle and family dynamics. I imagine her empathic and nuanced treatment of this complex topic will be a comfort to those who have lost a loved one to suicide.

Told in an order that makes emotional sense, the sum of these story parts adds up to a satisfying ending—an impressive achievement.

If you are interested in other book recommendations, check out my reviews of The Caretaker, Wrong Place, Wrong Time, and The Sentence.